Wednesday, 3 April 2013

One Day, A Proper Title Will Be Thought Of.

I promise.

ANYWHO.

I told myself that I would post today, and here I am, posting today.

What do I have to talk about?

Well, lets see, what happened today...

Oh, that's right. At quarter to seven I slammed the boot of my car into my nose.

No, I don't know how it happened. I'm clumsy.

Yes, I basically punched myself in the face. There's a small cut on the bridge of my nose, and my right eye will probably look like I was legitimately punched tomorrow.

So, I've decided to make a tally.

I call it...

Sparky's Injury Count Of The Past Four Days.

Actually, that isn't right.

Sparky's Self-Inflicted Injury Count Of The Past Fours Days.

We're counting back from most recent to least recent, guys, read and fins out just how clumsy I've been this week.

1. Head butted my locker
2. Stood up into the locker door above mine
3. Tripped on chair leg in class
4. Almost dropped TMS in hallway and jabbed myself in the side with my laptop
5. Stubbed my toe while attempting to kick friend
6. Hit self in head with trombone
7. Slammed boot door onto my face
8. Fell out of bed due to tangled sheets

**Pause**

Yes, that all happened today. If anyone's curious as to why I'm still carrying TMS around, I lent it to a friend and she gave it back today.

**Yesterday**

9. Walked into the side of a door
10. Rolled ankle on misplaced shoe in bedroom
11. Tripped on laptop charge cable
12. Opened door into my face
13. Had fight with doorframe- lost
14. Accidentally ran into different doorframe, purple bruise on left hip
15. Legit walked into a wall, I don't even know how
16. Mirror/cupboard door swung into my head

**Pause again**

That's all after school finished yesterday.

17. Someone dropped their lock on my foot
18. Someone beat me with a hardback book for incorrectly quoting Percy Jackson
19. Had chocolate thrown at my head for being possibly too obsessively corrective of an SP quote
20. Walked into doorframe with eyes shut cause I was tired

**Day Before Yesterday**

21. Walked into a different wall, still not sure how that even works
22. Hit head against wall from laughing too hard
23. Made the stupid decision to punch a wall
24. Made stupid decision to kick a wall
25. Made stupid decision to walk in front of a friend fangirling about Clockwork Princess, got kicked in the shins
26. Tripped on shoelaces
27. Stubbed toe on laundry basket

**Day Before Day Before Yesterday**

28. Tackle-Hugged doorframe
29. Opened door into my face
30. Rolled ankle on trombone case
31. Hit self in head with trombone
32. Got tackled
33. Tripped on someones leg

So, yes, I'm having a clumsy week.

And, Jesus H. Christ, MY FACE HURTS SO MUCH.

I RUBBED MY EYES JUST THEN AND THEY'VE STARTED WATERING

IT HURTS SO MUCH

9 comments:

  1. You and Ivy.

    I swear to god...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Don't judge the permanently wounded!

      Delete
    2. Yeah Mist! YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND OUR PAINNNNNN.

      But seriously, Sparky, I know how you feel. IT IS PAINFUL.

      Delete
  2. Wow.
    You are one clumsy person.

    ReplyDelete
  3. You /tackle hugged/ a doorframe?!
    Well... Congrats!
    *gives her a can of lemonade*

    ReplyDelete
  4. Wow.

    Someone more clumsy than me.

    Though... I tripped over my own feet seven times yesterday... And ran into my mum's bedroom door thrice because I was screechign about TMS...

    And fell over two of four cats.

    And you're STILL clumsier than me!:D


    Congratulations, Sparx, ahhaha.

    ReplyDelete
  5. If I didn't know any better I'd say that you are constantly surrounded by contiguous walls.
    ...


    ReplyDelete
  6. I thought I was clumsy! You win that award hands down

    ReplyDelete